OH MAN. My excitement knows absolutely no words.
(Cut for spoilers and blow-by-blow recap)
Episode opens with Frankie grumpy about something — turns out Cat is out of town. With Sam. And she’s waiting for them to come back — and the wait is driving her crazy.
As it should, actually. Next we get Sam and Cat at the airport, all loved up and excruciatingly sweet. And now they’re back at their flat. And they don’t like unpacking. At all. First two minutes into the thing and we get an almost half-naked Heather Peace. Thank you Lord.
Anyway. Next we see Tess at the sidelines of her girlfriend Finn’s football game. It’s early morning. Tess isn’t exactly a fan — of the sport or of Finn’s mates, clearly.
Back at their flat, Frankie is still grumpy. She looks like shit, waiting for news from Cat. And a new flatmate. Apparently, she and Tess need one.
Frankie’s restless so she walks over to Cat’s street and looks up to see Sam fixing things by the window. So hot while at it, btw.
Tess and Ed go shopping. Because Tess is dating someone who doesn’t like shopping, for a change. Apparently this is 2 months later.
Back at their flat, Frankie has a visitor. It’s Cat
reporting for duty — er, telling her she’s back. Tess is out. It’s painful. Frankie tries to make small talk about Tess going all lesbian on her and buying a lot of tea of different sorts. After minutes of meandering, Cat finally says — I can’t sleep with you anymore. It was a mistake. (OF COURSE.)
Frankie is shocked and flustered. Cat goes on to say, “I won’t do this to Sam. I love her, I wouldn’t leave her.”
Yep. But they make out anyway. Cat pushes Frankie away — after a good couple of secs, that is.
Anyway — Ugh they still have lovely jackets in this show.
Back at work, Jay is looking at photos of girls. As usual. Apparently, Cat and Sam came from Rio. Cat asks him if he has anything to smoke — and by that she didn’t mean cigs. And because they’re perfectly responsibly adults, they proceed to get high during work hours.
Cat tells Jay she and Frankie “were sleeping together” before she went away. I don’t know about you, but syntax tells me it happened more than once.
Jay asks, “Does Sam know?” and Cat says, vehemently, of course not. She doesn’t wanna mess things up with her and she told Frankie it can’t happen again.
Jay asks her if she’s still in love with Frankie. She totally evades it and says she doesn’t want to talk about it, and that she just wants to get high. Whatever girlfriend, you definitely have a problem.
Frankie’s going around in her leather jacket again, looking for her mother. K noted.
Back at Cat and Jay’s workplace, they’re high as fuck and they’ve just been told they have a pitch to make to clients in 45 minutes. LOL I missed humor like this.
Back at their flat, Tess is back and she has a visitor-slash-prospective flatmate. WHO IS HOT. HNGGGG. She has a nice voice. I like her. She looks like Lena Headey and Olivia Wilde combined. She likes music. She has a great sense of humor. Plus she and Tess have ~chemistry. And she looks great in jackets. A++++
Meanwhile, Cat and Jay are making a hilarious presentation while high. HAHAHA. Jay eats Champola like there’s no tomorrow and Cat talks about tulips. FANTASTIC. I like Cat better when she’s high.
When Frankie comes back, it turns out she and Lexy have already slept together. Sweet lord, what a small world.
Finn comes in and totally cockblocks Tess, who was flirting with Lexy in their kitchen.
Back in their flat, Sam and Cat are getting ready for their night out. Sam’s voice ♥ I don’t know about you, but hot cop’s speaking voice always rearranges my insides.
Anyway — Cat complains about being too tired to go on a night out — “You sure you don’t want to go alone?” and Sam goes, “Everybody’s excited to see us.” Oh Sam.
The gang at Rubies. I love this place. Cat and Frankie exchanging weird, heavy looks. Ed wants to get laid and Jay and Frankie try to get in some douchebag advice, and Sam goes, “Well, you can try being friendly. Worked for me.” BANG TENSION.
Apparently, Lexy is a doctor. There’s a bit of flirting with Sam and we’re like PLEASE PLEASE LET IT BE LEXY/SAM THIS SEASON. /fantarding
Anyway, Jay wheedles Frankie, Lexy and Ed into a stall to shoot some coke. Hot damn Lexy is hot. She’s a doctor shooting some coke FFS.
Anyway, Cat runs into Frankie in the bathroom. There’s an almost kiss in a tense moment that seems to go on forever. UGH WHAT IS THIS I CAN’T. Also — the L Word, Dana, Alice. YEP.
Also: Lip Service still has stellar music, just sayin’.
Back at the table, Sam is hot in a tanktop with her elbows on the table and her guns on full show. HELLO THERE NICE TO MEET YOU. Snarkily, she tells Finn, after Cat snaps at her: Enjoy the honeymoon phase. Uh-oh trouble in paradise.
Finn sees her mates come in. Uh-oh, trouble indeed. The panic on Tess’s face! PRICELESS!
On the dancefloor, Ed is high and is probably gay. HAHAHA.
Cat is worried about Lexy. Tess tells her Frankie’s already slept with Lexy. Cat looks perennially worried it isn’t even funny anymore.
Outside, Frankie and Lexy are smoking. It is hot like fuck. Lexy tells Frankie that the best way to get over one girl is to get under another — and by that, she didn’t mean herself.
ALSO: LEXY’S VOICE. If I haven’t emphasized this enough.
ALSO: Lexy likes Sam! HOLORD YES PLEASE.
I’d totally settle if Frankie and Lexy are written as lesbros. They could go to bars and act as each other’s wingman and– okay, moving on.
Cat and Sam go home because Cat is pissed and PMS-ing. I want to hug Sam so bad because her girlfriend is shitty. Sam goes to her concernedly and takes her home.
Meanwhile, Tess is KILLING IT on the dance floor.
Cat snaps at Sam about not hanging her towel up, and level-headed Sam goes, “That’s not what it’s about at all, you’re stressed and you’re taking it out on me, I’m going to bed.” I pause the thing to take notes haha. I love take-charge, level-headed Sam.
Frankie picks someone else up and goes home with her but only goes as far as serving the poor girl beer. Wow, Cat’s really fucked her up good no?
Cat apologizes to Sam before sleeping. Good for her. Sam forgives her. Ugh she’s beautiful. I can’t.
Tess goes to her audition and meets total cunts. Noted.
Cat and Jay apparently get the account, for being “eccentric” during their presentation. Expectedly, their homoophobic boss gives Jay upper hand. Cat is pissed.
Cat receives a postcard she mailed Frankie from May 2007. WHATEVER GUYS. Cat is so mad about having to report to Jay that she tells him she’s off to do “the wrong thing for a change.”
Oh, just. LUSH. How old are you, fifteen?
She meets Frankie for coffee. Transcribing this conversation in full for being ridiculous, considering:
Frankie: Didn’t expect to hear from you so soon.
Cat: Did you go home with Lexy last night?
F: Why do you care?
C: You know I do.
F: If you must know I went home with someone else. But I couldn’t go through with it.
C: I can’t leave Sam.
F: Yeah. You told me that yesterday.
C: We could still see each other. If you want me, this is the way you could have me until I’ve worked out what to do.
F: So I’m supposed to sit in the sidelines while you continue to fuck your wife.
C: Forget it, it was a stupid idea.
[LOL THIS EXCHANGE. Trahedya yan, mars. #publicserviceannouncement]
JFC they start making out in the alley like teenagers, it’s ridiculous.
Back at their flat, Sam is making dinner with a couple of friends. She is so fucking perfect it hurts.
Back at their flat, Tess is watching football with Finn’s mates. OH LORD HILARIOUS. I’m sorry Tess.
Cat comes back and she’s a total nightmare over dinner.
Frankie has Cat’s necklace. The one Sam gave her.
Cat is drunk and moping in the bathroom. Sam tells her that she shouldn’t let her boss make her feel so miserable.
Sam is perfect. She is PERFECT.
End of episode.
Things to hope for in succeeding episodes: Lexy’s back story (that doesn’t involve Frankie), slow unraveling of Fin/Tess and Cat/Sam, some Sam/Lexy thing. EEE MY SHOW IT IS BACK AND I AM UP AT 4 A.M. PUTTING THIS TOGETHER.