the real alex of “orange is the new black” speaks out

Vanity Fair scored an exclusive interview with Cleary Wolters, who inspired the Alex Vause character on ‘Orange is the New Black’, and she has a handful of things to say about the series, and what really went down between her and the real life Piper.

“We weren’t girlfriends,” Wolters adds for good measure. “We were friends with benefits . . . I was not the older sexy, glamorous lesbian who snatched her from her pristine Smith College cradle.”

Shots fired!

At the end of the piece, Piper Kerman was given a chance to respond to Cleary’s statements, to wit:

“If Cleary believes we were never girlfriends, that is startling news to me, though it’s certainly not the first time she has surprised me.”

Shots fired back! Haha. In any case, I think the two are better off living their respective lives, and I’m just sitting here amused at all these things coming out of the woodwork, so to speak.

tl;dr – Cannot wait for the third season.

what i read: that other true story behind “Orange is the New Black”

Easily one of the more detested characters in the web series “Orange is the New Black” is lead character Piper Chapman’s fiance Larry Bloom, who is played by Jason Biggs. I admit I hate TV!Larry too (because: REASONS, and yes, Alex Vause.) but reading Larry Smith‘s essay over at Medium about his life with the real Piper, his wife Piper Kerman — man, what an amazing guy. Also, a damn good writer. (And! Cofounder of Smith Mag. I’m a fan.)

Via MediumMy Life with Piper: From Big House to Small Screen, The other true story behind ‘Orange Is the New Black’

I have a soft spot for this paragraph:

Piper was the ultimate platonic playmate: We drank bourbon, ogled girls, shot pool in lesbian bars, and walked on weekends to all parts of the city, stopping to catch a church gospel service or grabbing a Bloody Mary. Best of all, no one gave me better advice on women, holding nothing back and offering a few pointers. If you’re a straight, single guy, I cannot recommend a no-bullshit lesbian bestie highly enough.

(Haha. Brings to mind a really drunken (and heartbroken) college party all of ten years ago, during which I actually sprained myself because of bad life decisions and I was assisted home by two fantastic guys. We all promptly collapsed in a heap of exhausted intoxication upon getting to my apartment. Bros for life.)

Seriously though: I love this paragraph because they were friends, first and foremost, and the other night I was re-watching that broken laundry machine scene from Season 1 where Alex goes, “We were never friends, not for one second. I loved you.” And I was like: Hm. So anong mas okay, yung friends kayo dati tas magbebreak kayo and then you also lose a friend OR yung hindi kayo friends to begin with para kung nagbreak kayo… oh fuck it. Does it make things any less damaging? All break-ups are damaging anyway? Haha.

(But then, this brings us back to that room in Paris: Alex’s mom had just died, and Piper was still decided on leaving her, saying, I can’t be your girlfriend anymore. And Alex goes, And apparently, you can’t even be my friend. So maybe that’s why ten years later, stuck in that dryer, Alex says with ridiculous certainty: We were never friends. 

Tangina nag-o-overanalyze na naman ako ng show.)

Anyway, back to Larry Smith: He also wrote this Modern Love piece for NYT in 2004: Hear That Wedding March Often Enough, You Fall in Step:

Slow as ever, yet indeed as sure as it gets, it dawned on me: She wants to get married. And if that’s true, then I want to get married. To her. This is perhaps the least original idea I’ve had in a long time, but I needed to get here myself, on my own terms. And after all these years one thing I actually had going for me was the element of surprise.

So what the hell, let’s do it. I still don’t believe marriage is the only path to happiness or completeness as a person, but it’s the right thing for us. So I asked her. Or, more accurately, what I said, sitting next to her on that silly island in a scene straight out of Bride’s magazine, was something about love and commitment and not going anywhere and here’s these rings I got you, and if you want actually to make it official, that’s cool, and if you don’t, that’s cool, too. And if you want to have a wedding, I’m into it, and if you don’t, who needs it. She’s still unclear what it was I was asking, exactly, but when she got done laughing, she said yes. And then she threw off her clothes and jumped in the water.

This guy is a good guy.


tgif: video round-up!

Basically: Gay things. Girls kissing girls, Apple’s Pride commercial, those adorable lesbians in that Cornetto ad and (wait for it) Frozen is the new Black.

Shura – Touch
Just leaving this here.

Cornetto Cupidity: Forty Love
So damn adorable it’s infuriating.

Frozen is the New Black
Oh my God. This is brilliant. “I have been chased… attacked… and called Adele Dazeem.” Tangina.

Inclusion inspires innovation. 
Enough said.

yearender: 2013 in tv shows

Ah, 2013. Man, this year was a good year to be a lesbian who watches a LOT of tv.

Like, a really, really good year. In a nutshell: This year gave me Tamsin (Lost Girl), Cosima Niehaus and Delphine Cormier (Orphan Black), Alex fucking Vause (Orange is the New Black), and Holly Stewart’s face (Rookie Blue). And in rapid succession at that — God bless you, Tumblr, for being my top rec source for everything obsession-worthy.

In summary: I JUST CANNOT. Not sure exactly how I survived all that obsessing but here I am doing this rundown of favorite moments. Subtitle: Thank you for being awesome this year, Canada!

Continue reading “yearender: 2013 in tv shows”

[pop wrap] music and orange is the new black

Jenn Lucas – Give me Love (Ed Sheeran cover)

Ugh, I was not prepared for this. (Also, would you look at that outfit. LOL everyone knows why I’m partial to this outfit, of course.)

Continue reading “[pop wrap] music and orange is the new black”


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